Bad Economy Jokes

I think we all need a laugh after all the stress this economy is giving us. Found a list of jokes from disaboom.

  • The economy is so bad that African television stations are showing ‘Sponsor an American Child’ commercials!
  • The economy is so bad, a picture is now only worth 200 words.
  • It’s so bad, Snoop Dogg had to start eating regular brownies.
  • The economy is so bad, I saw the CEO of Wal-Mart shopping at Wal-Mart.
  • The economy is so bad, law school students are having to get a law degree online because they can’t afford gas for their Maserati.
  • The economy is so bad, I went to my bank the other day and the teller handed me a note saying, “This is a robbery!”
  • The economy is so bad, George W. Bush appeared in a flight suit and declared economic recovery was complete.
  • The economy is so bad, Bill Gates had to switch to dial up.
  • The economy is so bad, Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
  • The economy is so bad, Dr. Seuss rose from the grave to write a new book: Green Eggs and Spam.
  • The economy is so bad that I went to my bank to get a loan, they said, “What a coincidence! That’s just what we were going to ask you!”
  • The economy is so bad, rapper 50 Cent had to change his name to 10 Cent.
  • The economy is so bad, Barack Obama changed his slogan to “Maybe We Can!”
  • The economy is so bad, my ATM gave me an IOU!
  • The economy is so bad that the highest-paying job in town is jury duty.
  • The economy is so bad I saw a man in Costco buying one roll of toilet paper.
  • The economy is so bad that I saw a van full of legal immigrants illegally crossing the border to Mexico.
  • The economy is so bad, I became a Pastafarian hoping that a meatball will appear to me.
  • The economy is so bad that parents in Bevery Hills are considering raising their own children.
  • The economy is so bad that even people who aren’t in Barack Obama’s cabinet aren’t paying taxes.
  • The economy is so bad I saw a polygamist with only one wife.
  • The economy is so bad that I saw someone using the sun to get a tan!
  • The economy is so bad that wives are having sex with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.
  • The economy is so bad, I saw four CEOs playing miniature golf.
  • The economy is so bad, Hot Wheels stock is trading higher than GM.
  • The economy is so bad, Obama met with three small businesses to discuss his Stimulus Plan: GM, Pfizer, and Citigroup.
  • It’s so bad, McDonalds is introducing the 1/4-Ouncer.
  • The economy’s so bad, Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
  • The economy is so bad, mothers in Ethiopia are telling their children, “Finish your meal! Don’t you know there are starving children in the US?”
  • The economy is so bad, that a prostitute asked me if she could borrow $20 until she can get back on her back.
  • It’s so bad, a stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.
  • The economy is so bad, that Martha Stewart did a show on creative uses for food stamps.
  • The economy is so bad, Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
  • The economy is so bad, my sister had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
  • The economy is so bad, even sexy Tabrett Bethell cannot save Legend of the Seeker.
  • The economy is so bad, that I bought a toaster oven and my free gift with purchase was a bank.
  • It’s so bad, I got a pre-declined credit cards in the mail.
  • The economy is so bad, hobos in Beverly Hills now have to drink tap water.
  • The economy is so bad, Barack Obama unveiled his plan to close Guantanamo Bay for good: He’s turning it into a bank!
  • The economy is so bad, that the White House turkey turned down his Thanksgiving pardon– all his wealth was in stocks, and he has nothing to live for.
  • The economy is so bad, Sarah Palin is only shooting moose for food, not for fun.
  • It’s so bad, I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”
  • The economy is so bad, my niece told me she wants to dress up as a 401-K for Halloween so that she can turn invisible.
  • The economy is so bad, that instead of a coin toss at the beginning of the Super Bowl, they played “Rock, Paper, Scissors.”
  • The economy is so bad that Roy’s tigers are now eating him out of necessity.
  • The economy is so bad, the Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
  • It’s so bad, they built an Indian reservation on a casino.
  • The economy is so bad, people are standing behind George Bush wherever he goes hoping for free shoes.
  • The economy is so bad, Michael Phelps has to share a bong.
  • The economy is so bad that when Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
  • The economy is so bad, a certain celebutante changed her name to “Paris Holiday Inn.”
  • The economy is so bad, Malia and Sasha Obama started a lemonade stand to raise money for bailouts.
  • It’s so bad, the Lone Ranger sold his silver bullets on Ebay.
  • The economy is so bad that 7 of 10 houses on Sesame Street are in foreclosure.
  • The economy is so bad that the only company hiring this week is the one that sends people to scrape bankers off the sidewalk on Wall Street.
  • It’s so bad, they renamed Wall Street “Wal-Mart Street.”
  • The economy is so bad, Angelina had to adopt a highway.

Hope you enjoy these jokes. Smile a bit!